How to introduce your partner to belly punching

How to introduce your partner to belly punching

Over the years, people have asked me how did I introduced my girlfriends to belly punching, especially Tammy. They wanted to know what’s the best way to do it without risking an awkward situation or possibly worse - a breakup. While there’s no universal way to do this and no guarantee that it will work, I’ll share with you some insights into how I think you could approach this situation for the best outcome.

7 minutes read

In my last blog post, I talked about belly punching as a fetish in general, while also sharing a bit about how I got into it. Now it’s time to address the most burning question: how to involve your girlfriend or wife in your unusual fetish. You will notice I refer to a female partner in my blog posts. That’s because this is the only way this fetish works for me, and my expertise is only valid in the classic “maledom, female sub” scenario. However, my tips should work for any couple - so try to adapt them to your specific situation if needed.

The unaware partner situation

This is sadly the most common case among belly-punching fetishists. Oftentimes, they feel the need to hide this side of their sexuality from their partner. Maybe because they’re a bit ashamed of their unusual fetish, or they’re unsure how she would react if she were to find out.

Many efforts are put into keeping their belly punching fetish a secret: incognito mode for everything, hidden folders, encrypted drives, secret second phone number, long, long bathroom breaks - just to name a few. But it doesn’t necessarily have to be this way. Sharing this fetish with your partner can be relieving and can open up new possibilities and incredibly hot, shared fantasies. For some, it might also be their first chance to actually practice belly punching in real life. That sounds good, but what’s the best way to break the ice? Let’s dig in.

Know your customer

This is the most important thing: before even trying to get her into something like this, you need to know if she’s at least a little bit inclined into BDSM, specifically into the submissive part of it. In my experience, most women are, even if they don’t openly admit it. If she likes rough sex, hair pulling, spanking, light choking, and the like - you’re in luck. Belly punching is just a few steps away and your success rate sounds promising. If, on the other hand, she doesn’t have the slightest inclination into this direction and doesn’t let you do any of that stuff in bed - tough luck. This doesn’t mean it’s a lost cause, but your chances are not that good. Remember: you should never try to force her into accepting any of this, physically or psychologically. There’s a fine line between BDSM and abuse, and that’s a line you should never cross.

The casual chat

Sometimes, having a casual conversation with your partner is the best way to test the waters. Try to have a chat about how “weird” some people are and how there’s a fetish for almost everything. Start with more common stuff like foot fetish, maybe mention how some have a fetish for the navel or tummy in general, then go into the BDSM territory and see how the conversation goes. If she’s actively participating, go on. If she just nods along and tries to change the subject, maybe it’s best to put the conversation to rest. You don’t need to actually get to belly punching in the same conversation. You could come back to the subject at a different time. But if you notice she’s genuinely interested in the subject, you could try to tell her something like “you know, there’s even a fetish for punching bellies”. Chances are she never heard of it. She may actually become interested in learning new, weird stuff. Tell her more about it, and, if she’s still interested, show her what you’re talking about and search for some belly punching videos on Pornhub or Google. Yes, pretend you don’t actually know where to find them. Don’t just go and open your secret BP folder to show her your favorite George x Tammy video just yet - this could still go wrong. She might be intrigued by what she sees, but don’t expect her to like it. Most women don’t. However, if she’ll notice you’re into it, then she might. At one point you could tell her this is actually something you like for a long time, but you understand that she might not be into it and that’s perfectly fine. She, on the other hand, might want to please you and offer to fulfill this fantasy. If that happens, bingo! If not - don’t lose hope. You probably need to gently introduce it during sex.

Intercourse is the best time to try new things

This is the approach that had the best results for me. It is also the most natural way to do it as - at least for me - belly punching makes more sense if you practice it in a sexual context. You can even introduce her to BP without her knowing what exactly is going on - she might just file it under “rough sex”. But don’t just suddenly start punching her belly next time you fuck. Some things take time and patience, and belly punching is a perfect example of such a thing.

Take your time, one step at a time

Each time you have sex, try to gradually increase the intensity and introduce new levels of “BDSMness”. Slap her ass, slap her face (if she’s into it), slap her tits, choke her, you know the drill. Each time you introduce a new level of intensity, pay close attention to her reactions. Don’t go too far, and I think this should go without saying - keep her horny. On a different occasion, caress her tummy, then slap the sides of her torso. Then start pushing your fist into her belly, especially in the lower part. Repeat this each time you have sex, while increasing the pressure. If, at any point, she stops you and tells you she doesn’t like it, quit it. But, if she’s horny enough, she probably won’t.

OK, now that you’ve gotten this far and she didn’t stop you, it’s time to start to lightly punch her belly. Start by pushing your fist into her belly as usual, then increase the pressure and rhythm. Start gently punching from skin level, then put some momentum into your punches. Look deep into her eyes and tell her how much you love her. Also, show her just how horny this makes you. If she’s still in the mood and doesn’t do anything to stop you - well then, congratulations, you did it. Now it’s time to have the talk.

The clear mind talk

That moment, just after you both came and lay in bed, it’s the best time to have an honest talk about what’s going on.

— Do you think I’m weird?

— No, why? Hopefully

— Well, I think I might’ve gone too far; I might be a sadist because it felt so good.

— Don’t worry, I also enjoyed it. Hopefully

— You know I would never hurt you, right?

— Naturally.

Now, there’s no guarantee this conversation will go down like this, just as there’s no guarantee you will actually get here. But the important thing is to be honest and constantly reassure her that you love her and that you’d never really hurt her. I can’t stress this enough, so I’ll say it again: she needs to be positive your violent side is something that she will never encounter outside of the bedroom.

Setting boundaries

Now that you got here, it’s time to set boundaries, learn her limits, set a safe word… You know, all the little things that make a BDSM relationship healthy. You need to know how hard you can hit her, where you can hit her, and where you shouldn’t. When she likes it, and when she doesn’t. You’ll learn all these in time, don’t worry.

To conclude

This is by no means an exhaustive guide to how to introduce your partner to belly punching. Not all people think alike, what works for some may not work for others. I’m sure some of you have your own experience in this matter or don’t agree with me, and I’d love to hear about it in the comments, below.